ARTICLES: fertile ground
Articles by Penelope Brackett

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8 Shifts For The Family Centered Professional Fall 2001 We've all shrugged all shoulders at the impossibility of balancing work and kids. The effort required just to "get by" sometimes seems monumental. Yet, our focus on "getting by" can be the problem. Believing it's possible and worth the effort to enjoy yourself, your partner, your children, your community and your business is the first step toward balance. Knowing what's most important and scheduling it, is the key to solving 80% of the working parent headaches. These eight shifts will help you identify the thinking that needs attention to get beyond the shrugging. They won't take the occasional peanut butter from the proposal or piercing cry from the background of your business call; but with this kind of constant care on what matters most, you'll be able to laugh at the mishaps, and enjoy your work and your kids more fully.

1. From: There's no time for me. To: When I'm happy, everyone's happy. Joyfully take care of yourself, knowing it's the best way to take care of your business and your family. When you're nurtured physically, emotionally intellectually and spiritually, you'll be more creative, patient and effective at home and the office. 2. From: Run as fast as I can and feel guilty when I inevitably don't get it all done. To: I schedule the important stuff and then I show up. Let your values determine your priorities, and put those priorities are on the calendar. Leave lots of room for the inevitable. Look at the balanced life you want for your children and model it. Let go of being "perfect" and accomplishing "everything". Make a plan, including emergencies, and then enjoy what happens. Embrace your very full life, get help and say no…a lot. 3. From: It's impossible to get excellent child-care. To: I am able to enjoy my work or play confident that my children are getting excellent care. Decide what's most important to you in a caregiver regarding time, and qualities and spend the time finding the right match for you. Communicate regularly. Re-evaluate quarterly. Trust your instincts. Note: Have lots of back up to handle upsets, such as sickness or extra work. 4. From: No time to build or maintain relationships. I'm alone with my business plan, my child rearing and my movie. To: I have regular dates with friends and associates who inspire my life and career. Business and social networks are essential for your personal and professional health. The benefit of regular adult interaction is fun, stimulation and profit. Colleagues, friends and fellow parents share challenges, resources and strategies stimulating your personal and career growth. Nurture that idea for a new brochure, Halloween costume, or movie regime with a little help from your friends and associates. 5. From: Intimacy is a child-rearing casualty. (It went with the waistline.) To: Two chickens came before and will be there after the egg. I make sure I have time with my fellow chicken. Insist on your couple life (Spouses for the married, dating for the unmarried.) As with the above, be creative and consistent. Make dates at the end of the night (even a 10-min recap), end of the week and/or end of the month, at home and away from home. Meet in the backyard, the balcony or the bedroom for talk, sex, and recreation. You're worth it. 6. From: Between your kids and career something always gets short shrift. To: Your business serves you and your family (not visa versa). Dare to design the career and schedule that would serve you and your family. (Allow for the changing needs of your children to transition into different areas and schedules.) Let your boss and/or clients know how your proposal benefits them. Maintain high standards for your work, while insisting on the business that will meet your family's needs. 7. From: I'm on my own. "Do it till you drop." To: I do it the easy way and get lots of help. Be brilliant at stating your needs to others and the payment and/or joys of fulfilling your needs. Develop many support systems, live, virtual and otherwise. These will include volunteers and paid employees. You may be hiring employees or setting out the benefits for your employer to hire them. Your support system might include your spouse and/or child's parent, extended family, chat rooms, a live or virtual assistant, fellow working or at home parents, or single friends (with a penchant for children). 8. From: There's never enough. To: My livelihood affords me the necessities, the time and peace to enjoy my family. Don't be trapped by needing more and more. Know what you need to be comfortable. Make a financial plan and fit a weekly review into your weekly schedule (see # 2). Give it the regular attention, so you remain connected and effective. You can feel free of financial burdens when you clearly work a plan to be debt-free and prosperous. This is the first in a series of articles focusing on family-centered professionals. These topics parallel my group program of workshops, "Mixing Family and Business". Please give me your feedback on the articles, any concerns you'd like addressed or strategies you've developed. Thanks, Penelope Sow yourself like a seed. BACK TO ARTICLES PAGE BACK TO TOP Home | About The Creative Seed | Services | Articles Creative Seed Network | Client Resources | Newsletter | Contact TheCreativeSeed.com 973-762-5871 | info@thecreativeseed.com All material copyright 2001 by Penelope Brackett. Site design by James Donegan. Photos by Jacquelyn Prussing 718.420.1334 jagunjac@aol.com Site development by Mark E. Lang, TBEdesign.com, NYC.